sometimes, there's a time when I just need to be silent without doing anything. cause, every time I try to do something, I'll hurt myself even more. life sometimes can be unfair. and I blame myself for that.

you seems happy. and I'm happy for you. it just hard for me to decide because whenever I see you, everything says otherwise. maybe or maybe, I can really face the truth. what's the truth? I'm not quite sure, darling. yes, I am miserable. sucking my life by thinking something that I'm not suppose to think. It's easy for me last time. but definitely not now. not in this kind of situation. i shall do something about my life. about me. about everything. 

but, for the moment, i just can keep on thinking and sigh-ing. how pathetic my life can be. haihh